Things I've learnt about myself!

Hi guys!

As many of you know (very) well, I turn 18 in little over a month, and I have seen many bloggers and youtubers do variations of "18 things I've done in 18 years". So I'm going to be pretty unoriginal and do my own version of this!

A big thing I've realised recently is that i can be pretty selfish, and I hate it about myself quite honestly. I'm really trying to change this but it's going to be something to work at properly and not half-heartedly. 

I am incredibly insecure about myself. Not as much in my appearance (sorry if that makes me sound vain) but in the sense of friendship and also romantic interests(that sounds weird haha!). I've always felt like a second choice to people and like I'm not good enough for a friend or crush. My confidence has also been knocked quite a few times in recent years, and I've doubted my friends opinions on me as well as others in my life, because I always feel like i'm bothering them. 

I'm scared of failure, which is probably very common, but when i feel like i'm going to fail at something, it stops me from doing it. This is very commonly seen in my school work as well as looking for a job. I freeze up and just bury the thoughts until i burst into an emotional wreck. I think that year 13 is going to be immensely difficult for me , because of the fear, and I am already dreading it. 

My life is honestly a mess! My room, school bag, folders, Laptop and brain are constantly messy, however many times I tidy, within an hour, they're messy again!

Which moves me onto the next point, I am incredibly emotional and I will be seen crying probably once a week and normally more than that. It could be over anything, happy, sad, angry, hurt. scared. Movies make me cry a lot, as well as books and TV/Youtube, whilst Planet Earth 2 was on, i actually cried over the Sloth that swam which made my dad laugh a lot! I also love a big gesture, telling friends how much they mean to me, complimenting my crush(this also sounds strange), just to let them know that they are important to me. my emotions need to be dealt with a lot and I'm sorry for those who have had to deal with emotional Milly more than once. This has made me very loyal (Georgia would be proud ;)) to friends, family, celebs and even characters( I'm incredibly sad i know). 

At this point in my life, I don't care what people think of my appearance, and passions,  which may sound weird especially after saying that I'm incredibly insecure, but I dress for myself and wear what I like, and not to impress others. I also LOVE my hair short and my eye makeup bold and gold! I love rugby, Netflix and youtube and won't shut up about it ever! My celebrity crush list is embarrassingly long but I'll rock it! 

When I get crushes, I fall (not in love, but feelings) HARD! It can annoy me just because I normally make a fool of myself and it ends up going terribly, or I get friend zoned! I think i've got a lot better but there's definitely room for improvement. 

My Spotify playlist is mainly musicals and very cheesy pop music and I am okay with that. Especially with my recent additions of Mamma Mia 2 ( can we just take a moment to appreciate that film!?)  and Dreamgirls! I have been very fortunate in my upbringing which has allowed me to do things that i enjoy and I am extremely grateful for my parents and the support network they've given me both financially and emotionally. 

I don't know what i want to do in the future professionally, which scares me slightly, but I have a basic outline of what I'd like my personal life to look like and that may scare people but that's just me as a person! 

My last point is that I have an addiction to my phone and the internet in general, which is awful, I know, but social media has been very kind to me and has given me confidence in things (writing and my appearance) through the people I've followed. I've also met some wonderful people through social media who are very important to me. 

Thank you all so much for reading (if you've reached this point, well done, I'll give you a prize!). i wrote the vast majority of this at midnight so some of it sounds a bit weird!  I hope you have a wonderful day 

Lots of Love 

Ebonydaylightt x x x x 

Insta: @ebonydaylightt

Updated celebrity crushes 2018

Hey guys! 

ITS 2018! how on earth has this happened already? I am 18 this year so I've decided to do something that some may think is immature but i think is natural! So here is my 2018 updated celebrity crushes! 

1. Not a new one but Tyler Morgan is there again! To be honest I've liked him since 2015 so it probably won't go away anytime soon! He also saw me eating chicken on boxing day so i think i'm in ;)

2. A new one but if you follow my instagram, you will know my love for this welsh rugby player, named Hallam Amos! I've seen him play twice since the start of December so I feel very honoured. I'd also like to wish both guys a speedy recovery and I hope to see them both play in the Six Nations!

3. Some of my friends know about this one because I constantly snapchat them about him. So any thatcherJoe fans may know Byron Langley. A South African actor(in Spud; highly recommend it!), model(extremely hot so no wonder!),sportsman(ex-cricketer) and ridiculously talented musician. He's just fab, i must say!   

4. Taron Egerton is next on the list because he's got it all, the looks, the voice, the acting, the comedy, the friendship with Hugh Jackman. To add to it, he's proudly welsh, and I vastly approve. Kingsman 2 was so brilliant, so I can't wait to see his next projects!

5. The next maaaannn is John Boyega. Now well known for Star Wars, but he is absolutely hilarious and so so sweet, especially in his friendship with Daisy Ridley! Basically he's great. 

6. My last  "crush" isn't one but quite a few others including but not limited to:

Harry Mallinder

Henry Slade

George Gasson

KJ Apa

Cole Sprouse

Niall Horan

Kit Harrington

Callum Turner

Jordan Fisher

I hope you all had a fabulous Christmas and New Year, and i hope to be back very soon!

Lots of love 

Ebonydaylightt x x x x 

Insta: @ebonydaylightt ( check for semi-regular updates!) 

Tips for exam students!

hey guys!
In May/June, I sat my GCSEs. It was the most stressful experience of my life, however, I followed some rules that I set myself during my mocks, so I hereby pass on my (slightly dubious) wisdom, follow if you wish and you may be less stressed, however *DISCLAIMER* it may not work for all.
anyways, here are my tips to not being stressed during GCSEs!
1. Before you start revising, draw up what you want to revise that hour/day/week- then try to stick to that plan whilst doing so!
2.  Get yourself water/squash or herbal tea- preferably something that keeps you hydrated. This is essential for both your health and focus. keep drinking throughout your revision sessions, lessons and exams. This will result in you needing the loo more, but hydration is so crucial to staying healthy! also load up with healthy snacks-fruit, veg, crackers,with the occasional treat eg. i had a jaffa cake after i'd finished my day's revision.
3. Give yourself breaks during revision-if you don't do this, the revision that you do will go in one ear and out the other. the recommended time to revise is 40minutes to an hour. So give yourself time to walk around, away from your books, get a drink refill,go to the loo, talk to your parents about a silly video you saw on facebook, anything that isn't work for 5 minutes, then get back into the zone.
4.Don't revise all the time!- No person should spend their whole lives revising, because GCSEs are not the most important thing in the world! no matter what your teachers tell you! I'm sure you all have lives outside school, and you need to keep doing those things to stay sane, but don't spend all your time doing the other things!
5.PAMPER YO SELF!- for me this is very important because otherwise you'll just get ridiculously stressed. I had baths to pamper myself with a film or a tv show/ vlog in the background, as well as a bath bomb, bubbles, and a beverage. However you can do anything that relaxes you! I generally did this on the Sundays because it relaxed me before monday, because let's face it, Mondays suck!!
6.Make sure you've got everything ready the night before- especially your pencil case and bag for  notes. this ensures that all you have to do in the morning is wake up and get clothes on(shower if you're a morning showerer!)
7. Eat breakfast!- I know everyone says this, but it is vital. It keeps your energy up and (hopefully!) won't cause the awkward stomach rumble during your exam. It could also stop any nausea you are feeling in the morning. If you don't eat really early, take a cereal bar/piece of fruit with you. i also had calming pastilles and i really recommend them, so have one when you wake up and before you go into the exam.
8. DON'T TAKE YOUR NOTES/PHONE INTO THE EXAM!!!- someone almost took their notes in and they would've been disqualified if found. someone did take their phone in and it went off. they were disqualified from AQA exams for this season of exams. Taking a phone in is serious. please don't do it. You will regret it!

thank you for reading! I hope any mocks for GCSEs, ALevels or any other exams go well and I'll update very soon!
Lots of Love
Ebonydaylightt x x x x
insta: @ebonydaylightt

Update!!!

Hey guys!

So I've been in 6th form for a month and a half now so i thought I'd let you guys all know how it's going for me so far. 

Going in on my first day was amazing but scary at the same time, however i was quickly put at ease when i found that my best friend (Fi) was in my tutor as well as my other close friends, (Mimi, Anna, Charis and James) which was great because the tutors had been mixed up from year 11. The first few lessons were very interesting as the teachers were telling us course outlines and what was expected of us now that we are 6th formers. I am taking History,Government and Politics, and English language.  I also met 3 new people who have joined our school, who are all lovely and we all get on well. In the second week we had our whole school photo that was on VERY rickety scaffolding so my friends (Katie and Hannah) didn't really enjoy that. 

At my school, the 6th formers get involved quite heavily with house events, so very early into the term, house drama was launched. This is a 20 minute long play directed and written by 6th formers, performed by years 7-9s. This was something that I have wanted to be involved with since year 7 so finally having that chance is so fun, especially with such a good cast this year. The actual performance is 2 weeks after the half term(wish us luck!) so we've still got rehearsal time left to perfect it! 

the perks of being 6th formers are great because if we have a free the period before lunch, we're able to get lunch at 1pm rather than 1.10 like the rest of the school, as well as being able to sneak into the queue without being told off. We also have a cafe in our common room and are able to go out at lunch and break. 

One thing that I've been loving about 6th form is that I've been talking to many more people and getting to know them better as well as spending time with people that I'd drifted from in lower school, having free periods. This is so lovely because it means that my social circle has expanded and i'm loving being able to socialise more with people. however i also use my frees productively (sometimes) and do any homework or revision needed for my lessons. 

A downside to this new chapter is that I am CONSTANTLY exhausted! All my teachers warned us last year but I just thought that they were making it seem a bigger thing than it was, however they were telling us the truth, every night, i am exhausted. My friends and i joke that we will be bringing pillows into school soon! 

My GCSE results were interesting because i passed the subjects that i needed and wanted to pass, including maths, which i got a 4 (equal to a C). however the day after my birthday, we were told if we had got a 4 we may want to consider retaking because some universities may not accept that as a pass.So now i am retaking the worst subject in the world, which really isn't fun, but i want the chance to go to university. 

Apart from that, my experience of 6th form so far has been amazing and i hope the next half term will be as goos, if not better! 

I hope you all enjoyed this post and I'll see you all again soon!

Love from 

Ebonydaylightt x x x x 

insta: @ebonydaylightt 

Being 'different' and love challenge

Hello guys!
I am realising that I'm terrible at keeping up with this! However today, I've chosen a topic that is very important to me. It regards being 'different' to the society's image created for each of us. I am a firm believer that everybody is a separate person and deserves to be respected for that, whatever their size, height, ethnicity or religion, especially in this day and age.

As some may know, I was born without a Thyroid, which is a developmental gland, so it has resulted in me being a lot shorter than the average for my age range. However, both my parents and grandma are all shorter than average, so that is also a contributing factor for me. From a young age, it has been pointed out to me on a daily basis that I am short. However the 'reminders' started to come in more frequently in year 7 because I was with a whole new group of peers. It began to bother me a lot and I'd get upset because people felt it was their daily duty to keep me reminded that I wasn't the same as them. It made me think I wasn't good enough to be around them. It's not right that a person should ever feel like they're not enough because everybody has an equal worth on the planet, even if you don't agree with them,

By year 9, I had given up caring with people making the daily taunt in my direction, and I embraced my appearance, and the fact that I wasn't going to make it past 5 foot. (although people don't understand that and promise that I will, PEOPLE I WENT TO A DOCTOR!!!)  In turn that made me more confident in myself and i started to like the rest of me more, not caring and small things like spots and my hair being a different length to most girls my age.  although i know that I have friends that support my decisions and accept me for who I am, I have an underlying fear that not everybody will accept me for who I am, especially boys that catch my interest. I also know that not everybody shares my opinion on people so they may not like the fact that I'm not what they view as perfect from the outside.

My friends and family are people who I want and like to be around, because they love me for everything, including "imperfections" that society have placed me in, and I love them for everything, including what they feel that their "imperfection" is. If somebody doesn't accept you, they may not be confident in themselves, so try to help them love and accept themselves, to help make them more confident. although, Don't push them into something that they are not comfortable with because that could harm your relationship with them.  

People are different, and you should respect that,
so I have a challenge for you,
please could you tell family, friends and acquaintances that you are glad that they are there, whatever the situation, and that you love what they are, for everything they are, and finally that they are worth all the love, support and success in the world.  By spreading love, we eliminate the hate, and by starting small, and spreading it, we can carry on doing so.

I love and support all of you, and wish you all the success in life. you deserve the world.
as one of my favourites songs says, "Don't look back in anger."
respect, love and accept.
LOADS of love
Ebonydaylightt x x x x
instagram: @ebonydaylightt

summer 2017 update

Hello guys!

long time no see! As you all probably know, i have recently finished my GCSEs so i haven't blogged for AGES and I'm so sorry for that. This summer, I have a lot of excited things planned, so stay tuned to this space, as well as my instagram!

just wanted to let you know that I am still alive and LOVE you all! 

thank you for the ongoing support, 

love from

Ebonydaylightt x x x x

instagram: @ebonydaylightt 

Berlin day 3-Pictures as well!

Hi Guys!

So, here is day 3!

we were woken up again at about 7:30 to have breakfast (pretty decent again!) and started to pack up our stuff, even though everybody in our room had managed to not pick up a key card, so we had to get let back into our room by a staff member!!!! We took our bags to reception then went back to the station to buy even more food. We then walked to the Mall of Berlin to do some much needed SHOPPING! I stayed with my best friend Austin and his buddies and we ate, and looked for tea(successfully)we then headed back to the Brandenburg gate to have a last look before walking back to the hostel to get our bags and get the train to the airport. 

At the airport, our teachers gave us 10euros to spend, so I got a lipstick and a pretzel. Soon it was time to go to our gate( ridiculously packed) before getting on the plane. I was sat on an aisle seat next to my friends Austin and Issy. She managed to sleep whilst Austin and I messed around for the two hours. We landed, got through passport control, and got to the coach. Finally we arrived back at school at about 1AM and my friend Katie and her Parents were kind enough to give me a lift home where i collapsed into bed.  My friends made this trip so much better so thank you Katie, Chloe, Naomi, Emily, Issy, Ellie, Joanna, Amy, Helena,  and Austin. I would've been far grumpier without you all

I know this one was short, but we didn't do much, and i've decided to add some pictures as well, so enjoy!

hope you enjoy the final part of my travel diary and thank you all for reading,
love from
Ebonydaylightt x x x x
insta: @ebonydaylightt